archived notes for Oct. 1999

10.29.99 - Started new website project, the Akhu shrine. Still in progress.

No new Vent, but I really did paint my nails blue, as the image below does indeed illustrate. I need to get a digital camera of my own so I can stop mooching off Dave's.

I switched shifts! Jeff, my nice roommate, has opted to take the night shift I currently occupy so that I can be up at the hours I need to be. Jeff is very cool. Everyone please write him and tell him how cool he is.

I need to sleep now.

10.28.99 - Cut my list drastically. Now down to:

German Chamomile, Clove Bud, Cypress, Eucalyptus, Frankincense, Geranium, Ginger, Lavender, Lemon, Myrrh Gum, Jasmine Absolute, Rose Absolute, Peppermint, Petitgrain, Rosemary, Sandalwood, Tea Tree, Red Thyme.

I'm babbling in Vent again, but this isn't unusual, yes?

No movement for Steph for a few months. I'm staying put for a while. Oh, and I must add -- the new Handspring Visors sure are nifty.

10.27.99 - So I just drew up a prospective list of essential oils I'm going to be buying to start my studies in aromatherapy. If worst comes to worst, I'll have a lot of perfume-making supplies by the time this is over.

But, y'know, when I cleaned my floors with lavender oil they really did smell wonderful. I think there is some validity to it in that scents can make us feel better if they're associated with good memories, and some oils have beneficial traits.

You might be wondering why I'm doing this. Most likely it's because I asked (ha ha) to be a heri-sesheta of Bast, and so She decided to make it known that She was associated with perfumery in antiquity. Not like She showed up and sprayed me with the latest sample of White Diamonds. Nah. I just made it known that I wanted to know more about what a heri-sesheta of Bast did, and up surfaced an article about fragrances and Bast. And then a book by Lise Manniche on Egyptian aromatherapy got published. I got the point.

I like lists. I like seeing the things I'm ordering in a neat little row, smiling at me as I set aside money to buy them. So I'm going to put my little row of oils I intend to buy here for you to see. Not sure if I have the money for all of them, but we'll see.

Bergamot, Carrot Seed, Red Cedarwood, German Chamomile, Roman Chamomile, Cinnamon Leaf, Clove Bud, Cypress, Eucalyptus, Lemon Eucalyptus, Sweet Fennel, Frankincense, Geranium, Ginger, Hyssop, Lavender, Lemon, Lemongrass, Lime, Myrrh Gum, Nutmeg, Neroli, Jasmine Absolute, Rose Absolute, Mandarin Orange, Sweet Orange, Palmarosa, Black Pepper, Peppermint, Petitgrain, Rosemary, Rosewood, Clary Sage, Sandalwood, Tagetes (Marigold), Tangerine, Tea Tree, Red Thyme, White Thyme, Vetiver, Ylang Ylang Extra.

Actually, come to think of it -- I probably won't be able to afford all this. Oh well. I can cut in creative ways.

I'll tell you all what I think of all this as I start experimenting. Nothing much else going on. Still listening to the Live album. Ate a french toast bagel. Yum.

You know....

Ed Kowalczyk's lyrics don't often make sense. But here's a snippet from one of the new songs to give you an idea of why I love this band.

yeah I found god
and he was absolutely just like me
he opened my mouth, looked down my
throat
told me I was thirsty
he said, I been, I been, I been
been in this water all my life
never took the time to breathe, breathe,
BREATHE!

("where fishes go", copyright © 1999 Kowalcyzk, Taylor)

(sigh)

10.26.99 - (Addendum: So I lied. Here's a short Vent for ya'all.)

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah it's starting all over again. I'm stuck on Live.

Well, I'm stuck on one Live song. Jeez, what is with Ed K. and water? He just loves talking about water and rivers and oceans and water and sex and water. This guy must have grown up either on an island or in a desert. He does bring up some cool themes, though, that remind me of Egypt. Like the song about the sun and the stuff about having scorpions in your hair. Whoo. Scorpions.

I grew up in a desert. Bet you didn't know that! Well, not my entire life, but for a leeetle bit of it. I didn't like it much. Very, very uncomfortable. After a certain hour you couldn't go play on the swing sets or the slides because they were all made of metal and it would burn you. In the early mornings it was so cold, too, because the desert is like that. I remember being able to look out from my grandmother's backyard and seeing where the green lawn turned into sand. Sound like anyplace you know?

My short, spoiler-free review of Fight Club: If you're under thirty you'll probably get a kick out of it. If you're over thirty, you might still get a kick out of it, but you probably won't get it the same way a so-called Gen-Xer would. You shouldn't go if you're easily offended. You shouldn't read any other reviews of it if you do intend to see it. And unlike other reviewers, I didn't find it all that depressing (Se7en was depressing -- Fight Club was a black comedy with some fast and furious social commentary tossed in to justify its bleak sense of humor). I think it was an amusing, sharp, well-told tale and it deserves high praise. I'll probably go see it again. I liked it. The soundtrack, by the Dust Brothers, also kicks ass.

Oh, and I'm back from Chicago. The next Vent is coming, but just not right now. I listened to Memoirs of a Geisha on my way back, and I thought it was decent -- the author gets four stars for mood -- but the ending was really far too chipper to be a Japanese story. On the bright side, I came home to the Live CD and three Sailor Moon manga books, and EVERYONE WAS DEAD by the second one. Whoo hoo! Go Naoko-san!

Back to Ze Project for Ze Company.

10.21.99 - I lied. I wrote another Vent. Woe is me.

I argued with Mike over breakfast about the game we're currently in pre-production for at The Company. Mike wants to base religion off of the modern ones, complete with proselytization as something that is part of the system of being a cleric. I didn't agree. We both did agree, though, that we don't want wimpy healers in the game.

Course, then Dave had to open his pie hole and mention that healers in GSIII were actually fun to play, and I have to agree. My secondary character was a healer. She's fun when all I want to do is make like a doormat in the middle of town and RP creatively whilst bleeding on people.

I used my incredible ability to be goofy and made Mike's coffee carafe talk. That was the extent of my creativity this evening.

Oh, and I argued with Ron. Blech.

10.20.99 - Swinging into a busy groove here at work. It's deadline time! Which means I'm going to have to take my trip to Chicago early so I can be here when the project goes into crunch mode.

Which also means no Vents for a while, since I promised I'd do work on Kemet.org, and what little time I do spend away from the project I will be spending on that.

But for the curious, take a look at what I'm pondering on doing to the front page. It's not done yet, but it's a nicely modified image of Amber, who was shoving her face in the camera when I tried to take a picture of her last night.

Dave got a new lizard. It's very spiney, and very green. Reminds me of the iguanas my brother had when I was a kid. I don't think I'd personally want a lizard, though. Just not my kind of animal.

10.19.99 - Blah blah blah anime blah blah. My feet hurt less, at least. I wrapped them up in a ripped up towel that I soaked in a solution of chamomile and lavender. Pretty simple to do: I boiled some water and threw in a handful of dried chamomile flowers. Turned off the heat, let them steep for ten minutes. Then I strained the liquid into a bowl, picked up the remaining plant matter and squeezed them over the bowl, then threw them in the sink. Added to the liquid six drops of lavender oil (one for each blister, and two for good measure), mixed it up, and dropped the rags in to soak. Then I wrung them out, wrapped my feet, and watched Sailor Moon.

Just a note: if you do do this, a) make sure you're in bed or propped up on a couch somewhere when you do; you won't be able to move afterwards and b) don't sue me if something really bad happens. I'm not a doctor, and what works for me may not work for you. As well, if you have ragweed allergies and you've never used chamomile before, you may wish to avoid it. Chamomile has been known to trigger ragweed allergies.

But otherwise, it does seem to have helped me, and I will probably repeat the process this evening before I go to bed.

10.18.99 - Wow. My feet hurt.

Indiana is nice this time of year. Leaves turning, air is brisk and chilly. The perfect weather for packing nothing but short-sleeved shirts. Yup.

On the bright side, this is probably the smoothest that a trip to see my father has ever gone. Somewhere over the last two years I think he's lost most of the power he had over me to make me flustered. Not that there's really anything I should be flustered about...but he's still my father. Y'know?

So. Yeah. Well, it was nice seeing him. And my stepmother, who is a fine lady. I got her flowers. Which reminds me, Indianapolis airport is really chic. Go visit if you get a chance sometime. They've got Godivas and everything.

I ordered the new Live CD from Amazon.com because, even though I have to admit their lyrics aren't high art, Live's music is almost always good. I cringed when I saw the name of their newest single, but now the song itself is stuck in my head. AAAAAARGH!

I also bought the Sailor Moon manga, #2-4. Dave bought a Transmetropolitan graphic novel. While I'm pretty sure he won't read my Sailor Moon comics, I will definitely be sneaking his Transmet.

And the whole office will soon be ringing with the sound of Live once more.

10.12.99 - Not much going on. Just life.

Uh, it is the 12th...right? Yeah. Oh, thwew.

New Vent. Three days to D-Day (Dad Day). Not much else.

10.11.99 - Yay me! I finished up the Bast side of the site!

And I wrote a song. But it's not done yet. It's sort of depress-o college music. Too much of the fragile in my system.

But then, I have to admire a man who can use the sound of a sword being drawn in his music.

Oh, and I babbled about life and Buffy, the Vampire Slayer in my Vent today.

10.10.99 - It's Sunday. That means I'm back at work once more.

But I got the main parts of the Bast site done and in the can. A couple additions/changes (like some translations and revised information) but otherwise it's the same essay. Eventually I'll port over my rants and ravings, gallery, and bio but for now what was important was the essay and making sure that was available.

Believe it or not, the duo-colored message pane wasn't intended. I screwed up on one of the early prototypes and realized...hey, that's kind of cool.

Dave's site is dead. Blame Brinet. My site is fine, and now I gotta start building banners for it. So people can link to me and stuff.

Work. Bye.

10.09.99 - "We wanted to change the world. We didn't want to die for it, though."

This is the line that's been running through my head for the last couple of days. It's a story, but it's not quite ready. Still, good to write down the line somewhere so that I know about it when it is ready.

We watched Arcadia of My Youth (a.k.a. Captain Harlock) tonight. I think I want a bigass space pirate ship of my own.

I would name it the Vorpal Wind and I'd make sure to draw a little jagged scar across my face with an eyeliner pencil every morning. I'd wear a patch over my eye -- alternating weekly so as not to weaken one of my eyes -- and I'd lose weight so I could squeeze into a slinky black bodysuit with a skull and crossbones stitched on the front. I'd make sure that the flag on the Vorpal Wind flapped proudly -- even in the vacuum of space -- and I'd have a black cape with a blood-red interior that I'd swirl around my ankles constantly.

And I'd have a neat rapier that fires laserbeams. Ooooh.

Everyone would call me Cap'n Steph, and I'd make sure my crew loved me in that abstract loving way that all crews love their captain.

Seriously, I look up at the stars sometimes and I get a little wistful. My generation will probably never know a weightless existence, but it's entirely possible my children will get a chance to see the earth in gibbous from the moon.

Not that I'm really a s-f fan...or a pirate fan, for that matter. And Arcadia was not great -- which I suspect is the fault of the bad 1982 American dub we were watching -- but there was something in it that inspired a wistfulness in me as I drove across Mooville from home to here. I never had much of a desire to take to the stars, but sometimes I just want to know what it's like to be weightless, what it's like to look out the window and see nothing but the expanse of dead space around you. And I think about the strange things that will happen to humanity when we do in fact finally make space travel an established feature of our lives, and I wonder what will happen to culture and religion and language....

No Vent today. Still working on things on the other side of the site. Listening to the new nin a lot more now. Dave is evil.

10.08.99 - I go from day to day
I know where the cupboards are
I know where the car is parked
I know he isn't you....

Listening to the Dakota remix of "Hey, Jupiter" and thinking about things. Don't mind me.

No Vent today. I worked a lot on the Bast-side of the site last night, and I'm pleased to say that it should be opening up soon (and I'll be able to shut down http://www.dm.net/~steph/ and begin the long, sloooow process of fixing people's links to me).

I'm still not happy with the design, though, and so I'm playing around with things. I like the blue, but it's hard to read, and the point is that people read this, not that they get disgusted and walk off.

After babbling about being called Roo by my parents yesterday, I got an email from my stepfather (who hasn't written me in three months) with the subject "Hey Roo" yesterday.

There are no coincidences anymore.

Oh, I'm probably going to disappear for two weekends. Indianapolis and then Chicago. Another Midwest world tour by yours truly.

10.07.99 - Mama always said, don't talk about religion and politics. Well, at least I avoided talking about politics.

These are my days off, and I am enjoying them. I slept a lot. I closed my eyes and 5 p.m. and woke up at 9 p.m., which is good! Because I have to get back to my 2 a.m. to late noon schedule.

I made purple potato fries. They were yummy. If I wasn't so annoyed, I might have even put them in Vent today.

But I didn't. So you'll just have to live with a Vent about being annoyed.

10.06.99 - I write about being a tomboy. Kind of. I also put in a recipe for sherry chicken. Whoo hoo.

Dave put up a few images of me on his website. Oh, and there's some pictures of his other stuff, too.

Yes, I'm the one with the knife and the axe.

I want more anime.

10.04.99 - Documentaries on Sting can make for interesting babbling.

I'm tired, but I survived Archon. Whoo. I'm still tired, though. And today I'm going to see Dave-who-is-also-Fred, a remote staffer who works for The Company.

Dave and I discussed corporations and the inevitable Fall of America. I'm sure we're not the first. I think sometimes that Heinlein had it right. If you want to vote, you have to serve. I kind of like that idea.

Mm. Sleep.

10.01.99 - I'm tired, and Dave made me take a survey.

And my email is still backed up.

And I have to talk like I know something about writing in about, um, thirteen hours.

Help.