fivebyevif

I started this post earlier. I ended up killing the original because it was full of wailing and teeth-gnashing, and wallowing isn’t my thing (if I can help it).

There was one thing I liked about it, though. This:

So there’s nothing to say other than that this has been a crap month, and if I were Buffy the Calendar Slayer, I’d have staked February several times over.

True dat. February’s been a crap month. But for others I know and care about, February was an even crappier month. I’m giving them my support in any way it can come. It’s all I can do.

Here is the one bright point: contracts came in today for “Midwinter Gifts”, so by December 2009 I will once again be a published writer. Go me.

Next week is work. And more work. And still more. I have been blessed by years of strong ties to amazing people. This week has emphasized that and once again reminded me that I am blessed, even when I’m losing some of the things I cherish most. I’ll try not to take the refresher in that lesson for granted.

The radio silence might continue a while more. I hope not. I still want to post pictures of Mexico, but right now I need sleep, which has been in short and restless supply of late. I need to think about solutions, not problems. I need to not dwell on everyone and everything that February has taken from me.

I need to love, and let go, and be strong for the people who need me to be me.